You are all my thoughts
The words I long to say out loud.
You are all the unanswered letters and tears soiling my pillows.
The unsaid words and unsolved fights.
So much of what I love but not mine at all.
This is an open letter.
I have never loved anyone as much as I loved you and that love doesn’t just go away.
It lives in my cells, the pain I feel everyday and mostly in memories I have of you.
That’s the flaw of falling in love with me.
Yours will die with you.
My love for you will live on with me, with everything I say.
Everything I see and write.
You will be the cold place in my head,
the precedent for anyone else I will love.
I will write you into my sunsets and the walls of my home.
I wish things were different.
It’ll take another life because I can’t survive losing you twice in this one.