What if I had more stories left to tell- about us?
Could I dance with your ghost
Would I?
yes. hundred times yes.
We’d move in sync like water on sand, as if I’d never walked away.
As if all our stars had realigned even though we were worlds apart.
As if the universe wished us together,
willing this love to burn like fire when all we saw was leftover ashes.
I was the devil, dressed up and guard down.
Looking like all you wanted, just enough to make you forget what you need.
What you need is to run.
before my lonely eyes drown you in my oceans, before I make you mine.
I would give you away a thousand sunny days to have one last kiss in the rain, on dark moonless nights
To dance and cry
To let you talk me into staying when I was walking away
chasing an oblivion that I found only in you
You were inside out for me.
bare like my dark thoughts playing on the tip of your tongue
bare like the colours you painted me in even though I looked flawless with tears running down my cheeks
Inside out like our clothes on the foot of your bed
Swirling in your obsessions like cold milk attempts to dissolve in tea,
Bitter like the taste of your first coffee of the day,
Bloody like the wine stains on my lips
drunk like you after you kissed me
It was not love no
It was dark, thrilling and addictive
It was a disaster which I liked reliving everyday
A nightmare I did not want to wake up from
so consuming that I didn’t know how to move without you
The devil stands unbeaten in her game still
Because I ran away when I still had the upper hand
All I wanna do is lose to you now
Surrender because all I wanted then was to win
It was my game and you played me
Fine-tuned me into your dreams
Beautiful dreams still
not mine. no.
I left you in a mess of spilled secrets and
Now all I can do is dream of you
It’s hard to look at you but looking away would hurt more
so
Can I drown in your fullness and curl up in our old memories
While we make new ones
Would you dance with me?
Could you?
after everything?